Good morning world, the day started out ok, got up went for a walk came home got Leo’s lunch packed and then got him ready for school and then I had to drive him to school. While I was waiting for the bell to ring at the school I noticed a message from my precious daughter asking if I was awake, she had sent it while I was out walking and didn’t notice until then anyway I replied she wanted to tell me something that was on her mind so I said I would ring her when she got home which I did.
She wanted to tell me she didn’t need me anymore, she said that I am always so busy with helping her sister and driving Leo to and from school and when I am at home I am busy on the computer blogging and whatever. This hurt my feelings I didn’t know what to say so all I said was that it was kind of good as that meant she was becoming more self-sufficient but It did hurt my feelings, I don’t know why I am surprised or hurt she has always been the daughter who acted like she didn’t need me, even when she was a very young girl.
I have always felt that nothing I have done was good enough for her not matter how much attention I tried to give her it wasn’t enough but you know what this is not going to change anything I am still going to be there whenever I can, I will still watch my grandchild whenever I can. Why because I am mum and it is my job to be there for my daughters as much as possible.
Yes I like that they are becoming more self-sufficient and more grown up, but I also like to feel needed but at the same time I have a life that is not always about them like most mothers I try to do it all and like most mothers I fail at times.
I know my girls love me just like I love them, I have a different relationship with each daughter and they are all special and unique and I try to treat them each the same and differently at the same time no it isn’t always easy but I do try because I love them all so much.
I consider my niece Kelli one of my girls and in fact we are both very much alike so she is like a daughter.